Roger Zee Memoirs
Misha 5 6/20/20
So on this Father's Day morning 2020, I slowly pull up the shade to allow you a glimpse of the unfolding Misha saga. Despite a few hiccups, our relationship weathered Spring fairly well. So we decided to leave our kids at their respective homes and take a long weekend together at Misquamicut Beach in RI. Welcome to another chapter in my memoirs, "Life and Times of a Pandemic Musician."
We left our jobs early on a Thursday afternoon and met up at Misha's place in Norwalk, CT. We took her car for obvious reasons, LOL! I paid for gas and tolls of course. We arrived on an overcast day and checked into the motel. Then we took a romantic walk around the town and settled in on the beach to enjoy the sunset. On the way back to our room, we stopped at a small, seaside bar to celebrate with dinner and a couple of shots of tequila. All good.
Woke up next morning to a "beautiful, sunshiney day." We stopped off for a leisurely breakfast, then headed to the main public beach where we set up camp with umbrellas, chairs, and all. Misha did not want to go into the water quite yet. She opened a book and sent me off with a sweet hug and kiss. Few things in life get me off more than body surfing large, thundering waves. I thrill to the initial embrace, inexorable lock in, weightless, soaring ride, and terrifying, destructive crash down. All the time doing my very best to avoid getting sucked into an unbreakable undertow and pulled way out into the ocean.
Misha came by a little later, dipped her toes in the water, but backed off from going full in. She did not share my love of danger. Later in the day, the surf quieted and I convinced her to get wet, frolic, and swim with me. Ain't love grand! Truly sitting on top of the world...
At about 3pm, we headed back to the motel for a shower and some "afternoon "delight," falling asleep in each other's arms. Something very rare and difficult for me to do. When we woke up and started to dress for dinner, Misha asked if we could play a short game of Scrabble. I should have said yes...
But I never enjoyed playing board games involving words. It requires too much mental concentration, especially for someone like me who makes their living programming computers. So I declined and she got upset. Did I mention that Misha could get very moody, and once in that state, nearly impossible to draw her out of it...
So instead, we drank some vodka and went out for a seafood dinner, followed by too much tequila. Now most of the time, I could hold my liquor fairly well. Drinking allowed me an escape from my usually overactive, worried mind. But Misha, a tall, thin glass of water, could not keep up with me and soon got wasted. I had to cradle her to stop her from falling as we walked back to the room and made an early night of it. She insisted though on playing Scrabble and this time, learning my lesson, I went along with it. But she had no intention of letting me off easy.
We woke up next morning with brain-splitting hangovers. Totally my bad... Really angry at me and inconsolably sad, Misha began chain smoking cigarettes and insisted that we go home. Oh boy! Nothing I could say could convince her otherwise. We checked out and made the ride back to her house in almost complete silence. She would not speak or otherwise engage me. Frankly, her behavior shocked me, and for the first time, I admitted to seeing some real red flags on both of our sides.
I managed to make her crack a smile right before she dropped me off. But it took a whole week to win her back and re-establish our relationship. In retrospect, I wish I hadn't fought to get her back. Farther down the line, I learned the hard way never to act too needy and overwhelm the other party by making them the be-all and end-all of your life. Because really, with a little effort, in the end you can always find someone else to love.
So on this very lonely Father's Day 2020 in the Year of the Plague, with my kids afraid to visit for fear of killing me, I manage, as I always do, to look on the bright side while studying the astounding bass lines of Alphonso Johnson on Phil Collins' monster solo album, "Face "Value." Please stay safe. It's not over... One <3
YouTube - This Must Be Love - Phil Colllins
©2020 Roger Zee