Roger Zee Memoirs

"Life and Times of a Pandemic Musician"

Heart Attack 03 01/18/21

When the ambulance ride from Hell in Nov. 2016 finally delivers me to my new room at Bronx Montefiore-Einstein shortly after midnight, I break out in a cold sweat! As sparkly and polished as White Plains Hospital appeared despite the construction, Montefiore looks like a housing project -- much the same as the repossessed buildings I used to see when working at the NYC Housing Department! English as a second language? Here, more like a third! And that comes an inch away from costing me my life due to an anesthesiologist who can't speak intelligble English. Welcome to another excerpt from my memoirs, "Life and Times of a Pandemic Musician." B-|

Intense culture shock slams me at the Montefiore "Tower of Babylon!" But I keep my cool as the nurse checks my vital signs and hooks me up to an IV and heart monitor. Got to play nice in order to survive another day... Of course, no one gets much sleep in a hospital. I spend the whole night figuring out how to juggle my apparatus to get comfortable! The second I fall asleep, the nurse wakes me to check my vitals. And as soon as I get to know one, their shift ends and I wake to a stranger's touch -- frankly kind of exciting, LOL! Turns out that most personnel work a 12 hour shift here and get the following day off. Good for them, not so much for me. I get to tell my story to a different person every day! :-O

Nothing happens the next day except to arrange an angiogram with the Cardiac Cath Lab for the following morning. That's a procedure where they snake a wire with a camera up from your thigh to inject dye into your heart and photograph it. And just as in White Plains Hospital, also owned by Montefiore, they serve totally inappopriate diabetic food that requires me to get a shot of insulin before each meal. To pass the time, I eavesdrop on the elderly gentleman who shares my room and his large, loving, very vocal, multi-generation Italian family. Though I received lots of visitors in White Plains, not surprisingly, only a few undertake the trek to the Bronx. That forces me to talk up all the great food on nearby Arthur Avenue, LOL! ;)

After another night of very little sleep, they prep me early in the morning for the angiogram. They roll me down on a gurney to a vast, damp, flaking, crumbling cavern and park me near ten or so sleeping post-op patients still intubated with breathing tubes. I watch as one wakes and they attempt to remove the device. A fierce, horrific struggle ensues. Little did I know I would face the same ordeal in just a few days. :-[

Soon, a beautiful, sweet, young Asian nurse walks over and starts prepping me for the procedure. Man does my face beam! Once again, if I'm going to go, this definitely works, LOL! We engage in a little polite repartee as I quietly memorize her every feature for my upcoming sleepy time! Finally they roll me into the tented procedure area.

As they hook me up and start another IV drip, the head of the Cath Lab, Dr. Mark Greenberg, starts asking me questions while waiting for the joy juice to take effect. "What do you do?" "I'm a musician. I also write for a Music Magazine and host a live music, Cable/Internet TV show called The Working Musician. He says, "I love Jazz. Do you play any of that on your show?" "Yes I do," and whip off a few names. Dr. Greenberg starts getting excited. Exactly what I want! When I begin to get a little buzzed, he starts the procedure by cutting a small hole in my right thigh and inserting a wire that eventually reaches my chest cavity. He says we can still talk. But the more I "loosen up," the more I ramble on. Finally he tells me, "Roger, I'm going to have to put you out for a little while so I can focus on the procedure." So embarrassing, LOL!

Later that afternoon, Dr. Greenberg visits me in my room and delivers the grim news. Virtually no blood's pumping in or out of my heart. My aortic valve's shot as well as a couple of arteries that feed it. I'm going to need a new valve along with two bypasses to switch two healthy arteries over to my heart. OMG, WTF! But I play it deadpan. What else can I do? He says he's going to consult with the head cardiac surgeon, Dr. Robert Michler, and figure out the best course of action. >:O

Early the next morning, a Resident I haven't met before pops his head in and asks for Roger Zeitel. "Why do you want him?" I ask. "I just saw the DVD of his angiogram and wasn't sure if he's still alive." In shock, I smart alec him and say, "I hope you purchased the DVD!" Then I introduced myself. By the way, this exact same scenario played out a few days earlier at White Plains Hospital! I guess bedside manner doesn't get much emphasis in today's med school curriculum... :-(

Early afternoon, after his morning surgery, Dr. Michler struts in, grabs my hand and gives it a vigorous shake. I immediately dub him, "The Big Dog." That's what you want from a surgeon. A cocky, swaggering MF with huge balls bouncing off the floor who's gonna slice and dice me with total confidence! He explains he discussed my case with Dr. Greenberg and they're working on making a couple of decisions. One, they're not sure if I need one or two bypasses. They also want to decide whether to go with an animal or artificial valve. Here, I piped in. "If it's possible, I want to go with one from a cow or pig. I've heard too many bad things about metal valves." He actually agreed with me! He says, "Given your age, "The animal valve should last 10-15 years. After that, we can slide another smaller valve inside the old one without even cracking your chest again! We'll go up through your groin." Well OK! B-|

Thank God for my youngest sister, Liz. Although she lives in VT, she immediately drives down to take care of me. She spends the afternoon here and then takes my keys and goes back to stay at my White Plains apartment and feed my pets, make some dinner, and relax after a long day and drive. Next morning, she gathers up some of my toiletries and clothes and returns to the hospital. By the way, my oldest sister Karen who lives in Pleasantville, NY also offers to visit and help. Sadly, due to an unresolved family issue, I refuse. I now truly regret that as it only made our family rift bigger, wider, and more permanent. :'-(

Another day passes with nothing going on. The weekend's approaching rapidly and I need to get operated on before then! The following day I manage to meet at different times with both Dr. Greenberg and Dr. Michler who've come up with a plan! Turns out I will only need one bypass. They'll take an artery that supplies my left breast and move it over to feed my heart. That should suffice. Though honestly, I do worry if that breast will sag on account of that, LOL! As to the aortic valve, they're going to use one donated by a cow. That way, if someday I need another one, they can slide a smaller pig valve right inside it. So they set the whole deal up for Friday morning. I can't believe it's really gonna happen. And happen fast! :-O

I spend today once again in Pandemic lockdown, once again in fear for my life in Apocalyptic America. I tried to sign up online for the Covid vaccine yesterday at the White Plains County Center, but they're completely booked up through the end of April and wouldn't even let me enter my info. So now I'll just chill for the next few days hoping that President-elect Biden survives his inauguration, takes office, and hopefully straightens out the vaccine mess! Off now to play some bass and refresh my fingers on the low lines to Spirit's "Greatest Hits." Their "1984" tune remains remarkably appropriate to 2021! One <3

YouTube - 1984 - Spirit